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October 06, 2005
Casual Dating?
What is a casual dating, exactly? Wikipedia doesn’t have an entry for it, but right near the top of possibilities is “casual relationship.” This must be close enough to what casual dating is supposed to mean. Wikipedia says it’s the term “used to describe the physical and emotional relationship between two unmarried people who engage in uncommitted sex acts.”
That took us from dating to sex pretty fast – but is that what you really want?
Very few of my casual relationships have turned out well. I can’t keep the distance that’s required to pull it off. If I really like someone as a person and we’re having sex, my natural instinct is to cuddle up and whisper wonderful things into their ear because it feels good to share that bond with another person, even if that bond really isn’t there. I’ve found that even if I’m clear at the start, my attitude and the things that I say will bring these people in to believe that there’s a different reality occurring than the one that was originally laid out. It’s bad news, whichever way you flip it!
Is casual cool or is it an unattainable myth that we all can only hope for?
Posted by Tyric at October 6, 2005 09:07 AM
Comments
Wow. I wish you had the answer to this question. Really. A dating/sexual relationship I had just recently ended and I think this is how he felt. We are both very attracted to each other and also enjoy each other's company, but his heart is somewhere else. And because my heart was with him, I opted to "see where it goes". Sounds like I'm pretty lucky he wasn't ok with it.
Trouble is that now we are "just friends" though it's a little weird-the subject of kissing came up last week and he treats me differently than just a friend would-perhaps it's just that we've shared intimate moments, but still...
I am hoping we are the exception-that things turn out well, whatever the ending is...
Posted by: Mags at October 7, 2005 10:44 PM